Communicate on the Same Wavelength



A new person joins a team. They are experienced, full of energy and ideas – a typical team player. They like to solve problems as a team and ask direct questions. After all, the most important thing is to reach the goal efficiently and collectively while overcoming all obstacles along the way, right? Well, not […]
The meeting took place on time and was very substantive, but it was poorly assessed. What was the reason? People in lower positions did not show the proper amount of respect to their superior. It was so strange that everyone met in a good restaurant, talked, took a taxi; it was relaxed, pleasant and friendly. […]
Psychologist Kurt Lewin made a simple comparison of the two types of cultures. He compared them to two fruits: coconut and peach. The coconut is hard on the outside but sweet and soft on the inside. The peach, meanwhile, is soft and sweet on the outside, but has a hard pit. It is difficult to […]
“We are an experienced team, we’ve been around the proverbial black a few times. We have our own opinions and we can cooperate. Meanwhile, the new boss comes in and immediately tells us what to do. When we call him out on this, he turns red and the atmosphere sours. Everyone is agitated.” There’s nothing […]
A new person join a team – and it’s the boss. They are completely untrustworthy. They have to ask about everything and don’t appear to have a plan. “After all, they should know everything and lead us along the right path. How can you feel secure with such a leader? These meetings where he invites […]
In an individualistic culture, people who can take a central position, express their opinions and convince others of their solutions are valued. If, in addition, it is an egalitarian culture, organizationally flat, then you can and even have to boldly enter the stage, ahead of your boss, and put on a show. In hierarchical and […]
“Yes of course. I understand what you’re saying. – Great!”. But why don’t you see all the signs that you’ve just received a refusal, and everything you’re proposing simply isn’t possible? You won’t get that report until Friday, that’s for sure. Why are you pushing? You received a refusal, only given in a way that […]
You order something from a supplier, meticulously specify the requirements, ask if it will be made in accordance with the specifications, delivered on time – and you are delighted! You hear over and over that everything will of course be delivered and completed. Yes, yes and again yes. Meanwhile, in the middle of the project, […]
In group cultures, where community and connection are more important than individuals, giving praise to one person, even if their contribution was indeed the greatest, is not welcomed. It embarrasses both the recipient and others. Positive feedback can also be a trap depending on the culture in which it is given. It’s easy to make […]
“What’s the point of deliberating and beating around the bush? The point is simple and everyone can see it: it is badly done and needs to be corrected. End of conversation – everyone can get back to work.” Well, Ok then. This may indeed end the discussion about this topic, but it can also signal […]
In some cultures, you look forward to what will be, while in others what matters most is what already happened. In the former, talking about the future – about what we can do together – arouses interest, inspires and determines key decisions. By contrast, in cultures focused on the past, the basic questions to be […]
“If there’s a specific task to do – you just do it! I have specific questions and I need specific answers to finish the task. That’s what it’s all about, isn’t it? Talking about nothing is really frustrating. All this small talk is completely redundant.” For some, it’s unnecessary, and for others, it’s a way […]
A poker face is a way of controlling one’s environment. An advantage that does not betray our emotions, and thus does not allow them to be used against us. This style of communication can also lead to bending the truth and deception. Communicating with such a person is not easy: you have to read between […]
For some, their charm is a tool they use on a daily basis. Such people consciously try to make a certain type of impression because they know that it helps them to better deal with various matters – both current and critical ones. Charm is not a rational tool, so it is intended to work […]
Other times, a person will support a decision they disagree with just to be liked. For the same reasons, this person also says things that they know another person wants to hear. Their motives can be nefarious or completely innocent. It’s important to realize that this tendency can influence our decisions. Some respond to flattery […]
For these types of people, any negative evaluation is painful enough to be interpreted as an attack. Others may judge this as a sign of hypersensitivity. The boundary is defined individually by both personality traits and cultural differences between interlocutors. Delivering feedback is generally one of the most difficult forms of communication and carries with […]
Resistance to public speaking, visible tension when talking about important topics, difficulty in presenting content – all of this is the result of internal tension and stress. Some people look stressed, but most other people think there’s no reason to stress. Here there’s a lot of space for unfavorable assessments and stereotyping. Simple relaxation techniques […]
Talking about your fears not only reduces stress, but also creates an opportunity to seek help. In addition, according to UCLA studies, it’s therapeutic, because it allows you to overcome anxieties. However, such a communication mechanism can be misunderstood by some as being contagious with negative emotions, sowing fear or even immature and egocentric. The […]
Someone’s excessive sentimentality can trigger a whole spectrum of strong emotions in the interlocutor or observer. From caring, through embarrassment, to anger – depending on the dominant character traits. Seeing or listening to a person who clearly, physically experiences emotions is something that does not leave us indifferent. We start to wonder what could cause […]
If you want to know what’s inside or figure out how something works, then one of the best methods is a stress test. In the field of relationships and communication, this is akin to breeching a sensitive topic and then waiting for the result. Asking a provocative question is an opportunity to check how people […]
The need to understand the mechanism behind other people’s actions can be very strong. Satisfying curiosity, i.e. gaining knowledge, allows you to better understand the environment, decisions, situations, and thus have a greater sense of control over reality. Asking about the motives, way of thinking, about the logical sequence behind certain statements or decisions is […]
People who discuss fundamental issues such as death or the meaning, purpose or nature of life on occasion tend to be interesting conversationalists. However, much depends on whether it’s the right time, place or right interlocutor for such a conversation. If any of these elements don’t match, starting such topics can be perceived as wasting […]
Everyone knows at least one person who regularly surprises with unusual ideas. Ones that could be implemented only under certain circumstances, and hardly anyone takes them seriously. For some, contributing left field ideas is a great source of inspiration; for others, it’s a nuisance that doesn’t lead to any specific action. Everyone may perceive it […]
This is a terrible way to gain (apparent) an advantage and is often used by people with an aggressive communication style. Sometimes the root of the problem is cultural differences. What in one culture is a method of working out the best solution, in another it may be perceived as public humiliation. In both cases, […]
Something like a how-to user guide for each individual? We dreamed about it too – every time we found ourselves on a different wavelength than someone else. However, we understood that such a guide would have to be created specifically for a specific two person pair and wouldn’t be universal. With this level of personalization, […]
We all know the situation. However, we also know that where there’s a will, there’s a way, even when there are conflicting interests. The key to solving such an impasse is skillful communication with the other person. This is not about manipulation – quite the opposite. It’s about speaking the other person’s language. When you […]
“I really don’t have time to discuss the obvious anymore. This task must simply be completed. I will keep pressuring you until it’s done – if not by pleading, shouting or blackmail, I’ll find another way. If not, I’ll be incredibly disappointed and that will also have consequences.” Do you know such people? Bosses of […]
Masters of one-liners will surely appreciate this. Not only them. However, building concise and succinct messages isn’t easy. Boiling down a lot of content into what’s most important, while maintaining sense and meaning – this is a task for a real master chef of a language kitchen. With this said, it’s worth understanding that some […]
Some people have the extraordinary ability to weave relationships from thousands of seemingly insignificant threads that together form an inseparable bond, while others twist together thick solid ropes for the same purpose. The effect and the goal are similar. Only the style is different. Differences in communication styles and preferences are not easy to diagnose […]
Longer pauses during a conversation may cause surprise and anxiety in some people. After all, such silences aren’t normal – something disturbing is going on here. On the other hand, it’s just a pause, a moment of silence to think. It’s not because one thinks too slowly, but because one thinks deeply and wants to […]
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