Narcissism, as a complex psychological construct, has fascinated researchers and therapists around the world for years. The question of whether it is possible to change a narcissistic person remains one of the most controversial issues in clinical and organizational psychology. Studies often present conflicting conclusions, reflecting the multidimensionality of this phenomenon and the variety of therapeutic approaches. This article presents the current state of knowledge about the potential for change in individuals with narcissistic traits or diagnosed narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), combining theoretical perspectives with practical implications.
Narcissism as a Psychological Construct – Theoretical Introduction
Narcissism is primarily characterized by an exaggerated sense of self-worth, a need for admiration, and a lack of empathy. Narcissistic individuals often present a strong sense of being privileged, a tendency to exploit others, and an excessive focus on their own successes and abilities. In extreme cases, this becomes narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), a persistent pattern of behaviors and attitudes that destructively affect social, professional, and relational functioning.
Research suggests that narcissism may stem from complex genetic, psychological, and environmental factors. Some scientists even point to potential differences in the structure or function of the brain in individuals with high levels of narcissism. This multifactorial etiology is important when considering the possibility of change.
Contradictory Research Perspectives
Analysis of the scientific literature reveals a polarization of views on the possibility of changing narcissistic individuals. On one hand, some studies present optimistic conclusions.
A study published on PubMed, which observed 20 patients with a clinical diagnosis of narcissistic personality disorder over a period of 3 years, showed a significant decrease in the overall level of pathological narcissism in 60% of the subjects, particularly in the areas of interpersonal relationships and reactivity. No significant changes were observed in the remaining 40%. Interestingly, the researchers identified three key experiences associated with change: achievements, new lasting relationships, and disappointments.
A more recent 2024 study, also published on PubMed, analyzed the cases of eight patients with NPD who showed improvement after psychotherapy. After 2.5 to 5 years of therapy, all participants showed significant improvement, no longer meeting the diagnostic criteria for NPD and demonstrating better psychosocial functioning.
On the other hand, French experts present a much more pessimistic perspective. According to experts quoted on Psychologies.com, a “pervert narcissist” (a term used in French literature to describe a particularly destructive form of narcissism) cannot change because they never question themselves. A similar view is presented on the pervers-narcissique.com website, where the author emphasizes that the narcissist’s psychological structure prevents genuine change – the narcissist perceives themselves as perfect and superior to others, failing to see their own flaws.
Factors Influencing the Potential for Change
Research identifies several key factors determining the potential for change in narcissistic individuals:
Degree of Narcissism
The initial level of narcissism appears to be a significant predictor of the potential for change. A study published on PubMed showed that a high level of narcissism in interpersonal relationships at the start of observation was linked to a lack of change during follow-up. This suggests that individuals with deeply ingrained interpersonal narcissism may be more resistant to change.
Motivation for Change
Spanish researchers emphasize that change in narcissistic individuals, although difficult, is not impossible – however, it requires significant and sustained commitment from the narcissist themselves. The problem is that narcissistic individuals rarely acknowledge the need for change. As noted by Mayo Clinic, narcissists often feel defensive towards treatment or believe that it is unnecessary.
Life Circumstances
French experts suggest that certain life circumstances may prompt a narcissist to reflect – particularly situations where they are without “victims” and must confront their own internal suffering. This moment of confrontation with their true “self” could potentially open the door to therapy, although experts note that such cases are very rare.
Therapeutic Approaches and Their Effectiveness
Mayo Clinic emphasizes that the primary method of treating narcissistic personality disorder is psychotherapy. Conversational therapy (psychotherapy) aims to help narcissistic individuals:
- Understand the sources of their emotions and motivations
- Accept and maintain real interpersonal relationships
- Recognize and accept their real abilities and limitations
- Increase their ability to understand and control emotions
- Set and accept achievable goals instead of unrealistic desires
Therapy can be short-term, helping to cope with stress or crises, or long-term, supporting lasting change. Although there are no medications specifically targeting NPD, in cases of co-occurring depression or anxiety, antidepressants or anxiolytics may be helpful in the overall treatment.
It is worth noting that a recent 2024 study observing positive changes in patients with NPD suggests that therapeutic effects are achievable, but require a longer period (2.5-5 years) of intensive therapeutic work.
Narcissism in an Organizational Context
Harvard Business Review presents an interesting perspective on narcissistic leaders. According to this analysis, narcissistic leaders can be both a driving force for significant organizational transformations and a source of potential problems.
On one hand, narcissistic leaders often possess the courage and charisma necessary to carry out bold changes and inspire others. They are willing to take risks and have the ability to persuade the masses with their rhetoric. In times of major social or organizational transformations, such qualities can be extremely valuable.
On the other hand, narcissism can become destructive when a leader lacks self-awareness and self-restraint. Narcissistic leaders often develop unrealistic visions and believe that only external circumstances or enemies are blocking their success. This tendency for grandeur and mistrust is the Achilles’ heel of narcissists. Business history is filled with cases where even brilliant narcissistic leaders led their organizations into serious difficulties.
Managing a narcissistic employee or superior presents a particular challenge. Harvard Business Review highlights the difficulties of dealing with the narcissist’s sense of entitlement, lack of empathy, and need to feel exceptional. This requires specific communication and organizational strategies.
Practical Examples
Case of Successful Change
Jan, a 42-year-old marketing director in an international corporation, spent years building his career at the expense of his relationships with others. His narcissistic behaviors – taking credit for the team’s achievements, devaluing subordinates’ work, explosive reactions to criticism – ultimately led to a professional crisis. When he was passed over for a promotion, and his team began to leave in large numbers, he experienced a deep identity crisis.
Encouraged by his wife, he began therapy, initially reluctantly and with the belief that “others have the problem.” After about a year of regular sessions, during which the therapist consistently confronted him with the consequences of his behaviors, Jan began to see the patterns in his actions. A turning point came when he recorded his remarks during a team meeting and later analyzed them with his therapist.
After four years of intensive therapy, Jan developed new management and communication strategies. While he still tends to exaggerate his achievements, he learned to appreciate the contributions of others, accept constructive criticism, and build authentic relationships. His team saw a significant improvement in the work atmosphere, and Jan claims that for the first time, he feels true satisfaction from team successes, not just his own.
Case of Resistance to Change
Anna, a 38-year-old HR consultant, entered a relationship with Tomasz, who displayed clear narcissistic traits. Initially charmed by his confidence and charisma, she quickly began to experience emotional manipulation, gaslighting, and cyclical crises. Despite the evident signs of a toxic relationship, Anna believed that her love and patience could “fix” Tomasz.
She repeatedly tried to confront him about his behavior, suggest therapy for the couple, or individual therapy for him. Tomasz responded either with violent denial and turning the situation against Anna (“you’re the one who’s oversensitive,” “you need psychological help”), or brief displays of remorse and promises to change. These periods of improvement, however, were always short-lived and served only to regain control of the situation.
After three years of a destructive relationship and numerous failed attempts to change the dynamic, Anna, with support from her own therapist, decided to end the relationship. Tomasz never accepted responsibility for the breakup, blaming only Anna and portraying himself as the victim of her “emotional instability.” Even after years and subsequent relationships, his behavioral patterns remained unchanged.
Conclusions and Practical Recommendations
The analysis of available scientific research and expert opinions leads to several key conclusions:
- Change in narcissistic individuals is possible, but difficult and not always achievable.
- Factors such as the level of narcissism, motivation for change, life circumstances, and access to appropriate therapy are crucial for the potential for change.
- Effective therapy requires time (often several years) and a specialized approach.
- Love, support, or patience from close ones are not sufficient to change a narcissist – professional intervention is necessary.
- In an organizational context, narcissistic leaders can be both a driving force for positive changes and a source of destructive processes.
For individuals in relationships with narcissists, whether personal or professional, key recommendations include:
- Realistic expectations regarding the potential for change
- Setting clear boundaries
- Avoiding the role of “savior” or “fixer”
- Caring for one’s own mental health and seeking external support
- In the case of severe narcissism, considering limiting or ending the relationship
For professionals working with narcissistic individuals, it is essential to develop specialized therapeutic methods that account for the specific nature of this disorder and conduct further research on the factors that facilitate change.
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